So from the beginning Randall's a dumbass teenager, reckless and convinced of his own immortality. Legitimate, but I've always hated teenagers like that. But it just really goes too far to be sympathetic. "Why are you overreacting to my plan to go explore some ruins in the desert with only my best friend in a nebulous time period with no cell phones or GPS location or backup plan of any sort? I mean, as a teenage amateur I'm obviously the best suited to explore this historic find!" "My brother fucking died on an expedition you twat." "Oh. Yeah. Well um I totally won't!" "Just promise you won't do anything dangerous or stupid!" "Too fuckin' late man... I mean of course not! Haha! Women, man. With their irrational worrying."
But teenagers, right? So they take a fuckin' horse-drawn cart to these ruins because Layton has no fucking clue what time period it's set in and refuses to be tied down to such antiquated notions, he gives his friend a crappy shovel so he can do all the digging, and they're off. One level down. Two. Sentry robots. "Maybe this isn't a good idea." "Where's your sense of adventure??" Three, four, etc. Spinning mummy robots with samurai swords. "Maybe we should reconsider this." "But that was awesome!" Couple more floors. Rocks fall, party is split. "Okay I'm fucking serious this is dangerous." "But I'm doing this to prove my worth to my girlfriend's parents! You have to help me!" "First off, that's still stupid, and second, why didn't you tell me before?" "I was saving it up to manipulate you when you got really serious about ditching my dumbass plan."
Okay, I'm being uncharitable. Last floor. Inevitable pit trap. The old "give me your other hand" rag can't get dumber, right? Oh, no, it can. "Give me your other hand!" "But I'm holding this precious artifact because jumping across a river seemed the best time to take it out of my backpack!" "Throw it up here or something, it's made of goddamn metal!" "That is not going to occur to me, so I will ineffectually try to scrabble my feet against this rock wall." "Lovely, could you give me your other hand now?" "No, no, this mask is too important. See, you have to take it and solve the final puzzle for me." "YOUR OTHER HAND." "See... here it... oh fuck I slipped. Bye."
Yes, he won't give Layton his other hand because the mask is too important. Whereupon he falls, with the mask still in hand. And Layton solves the puzzle anyway. It's hilariously pointless.
So they never find a body and it's obvious practically from the first time he's even mentioned that he's totally not dead. Turns out he caught plot amnesia (and a weird case of plot reverse-vitiligo. Thanks, Japanese racism) and he's been in a small town working farms or some shit. Then someone sends him a letter all "look how your friends and family moved on without you! This guy totally stole your family fortune and your girl! You should be pissed off and enact this plan for revenge I made for you." And he's all "OK
" and runs off to enact this stranger with no agenda's fortuitous plan for revenge with minimal questioning as to how this guy knows any of this or why he gives a fuck. Shockingly, it turns out he is being played. His old friend has been looking for him for decades! All his old friend's property is actually in Randall's name! He fake-married Randall's girlfriend so she wouldn't have to deal with pressure to marry someone else! He really needs some goddamn self-esteem! And of course
it's a fake marriage because god forbid a woman actually move on from her chucklefuck teenage boyfriend after a decade or two, what sort of callous bitch would do that. At least after this is revealed he realizes he is too fucking stupid to live. Whereupon he falls into a chasm and the old "give me your other hand" routine happens a-fucking-gain. Luckily his old friend is around with a "bitch, you ain't getting out of this that easy. We spent twenty fucking years looking for your stupid ass, I am dragging you up if I have to rent a god damn crane."
...If he'd actually phrased it like that, I wouldn't have been so annoyed. Anyway, all is forgiven, love and snuggles and I'm assuming a long-term poly relationship, Count of Monte Cristo has been thoroughly neutered.
I also like the part where Layton is all "This ends here." and Randall's all "Um... well... ok." What a quitter.
Then there's the post credits scene, which I described thus.
ok so you remember the foppish villain from last game with the mask and cloak and feather boa and giant robots
he found amnesia boy and manipulated him into being dumber than normal and threatening the town so that he could get Layton (or whoever showed up) to reveal the magic ruins under the town
so ending scene he's all "sweeeet ruiiiiiins all my life's work" and his butler guy is all "um there's tanks sir" and all these tanks and helicopters roll up with this corporate douchebag
and he's all "balls" and evil corporation guy is all "i love the smell of world domination in the morning"
and he's all "fuck you i'm'a charge at your machine gunners" and these machine gunners are all "your straight-line path and quick running make you an impossible target to hit"
and he's all "boo yah fuck your mooks now i'm'a punch you" and corporation guy is like "bitch please" and basically knees him in the groin
and then corporate's all "ok let's see what you look like under that mask" and butler is all "i am NINJA BUTLER! SMOKE GRENADE RESCUE GO" and they vanish
and corporation guy looks at the mask and is all "eh who gives a fuck. tanks onward"
and that's the post credits scene
No, really, literally, that is the post-credits scene. Except he actually knees him in the sternum.