0708: "Sex Dice"

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hintss
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0708: "Sex Dice"

Postby hintss » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:04 am UTC

Image

alt text: You roll for initiative, and ... [roll] ... wow, do you ever take it.

http://xkcd.com/708

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Steve the Pocket » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:08 am UTC

Are sex dice a real thing?

Don't say google it. The hell I'm googling that.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby hintss » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:10 am UTC

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=sex+dice

told you lmgtfy it, which tells you to google it :-)

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Zentropy » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:11 am UTC

Google results aren't too bad. Pretty much what you expect.

http://photoshopcontest.com/images/full ... 281658.jpg

That image may be Photoshopped but there are a bunch of others.

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Omegaton
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Omegaton » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:18 am UTC

I saw that ending coming, but that's probably since I just watched SMBC theater's new video which included DnD.

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby bdang94 » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:19 am UTC

SIMPSONS DID IT

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Anoria
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Anoria » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:24 am UTC

Questions that occur to me after reading this comic:

What class/level is the player where they're rolling 2d6 for damage? (Honest question. I don't play enough to know that kind of thing.)
Is one's fondling attack based on one's strength, dexterity, or charisma?
Could the body part die be used to legitimately determine the target of one's attack, and if so, who's already done so?
And finally:
How long until they start making sex dice with more than six sides?

Whyareall
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Whyareall » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:29 am UTC

Anoria wrote:Questions that occur to me after reading this comic:

What class/level is the player where they're rolling 2d6 for damage? (Honest question. I don't play enough to know that kind of thing.)
Is one's fondling attack based on one's strength, dexterity, or charisma?
Could the body part die be used to legitimately determine the target of one's attack, and if so, who's already done so?
And finally:
How long until they start making sex dice with more than six sides?


Could be a heroic tier rogue rolling Sneak Attack damage, if they're playing 4e.
I can imagine it now. "I sneak up to the castle guard from behind, and fondle them"

Hi Tehol!

EDIT: Or a ranger using Twin Strike with two shortswords, or possibly a rogue multiclassed into ranger, using the 1/encounter Hunter's Quarry, not having combat advantage, attacking with a shortsword. OR a hand crossbow. OR a shuriken (rogues get the damage dice of shurikens increased by 1 size, from a d4 to a d6)
Rogue sounds more likely, as they tend to have higher Charisma scores, and therefore more likely to fondle.
Last edited by Whyareall on Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:34 am UTC, edited 4 times in total.
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Dason
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Dason » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:29 am UTC

Did you honestly start the thread... have no commentary... and then double post to essentially say "First!"? *annoyed*

Anywho, if your fondling does 6 damage then you're really doing it wrong.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Human » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:31 am UTC

Wait... you don't use a D6 to roll initiative. WRONG!
Last edited by Human on Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:31 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby glasnt » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:31 am UTC

Clearly since one dice is missing, he must now find 5 breasts to do with what he will.

Where's Megan's sister when you need her.

HI JOEE

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Orca » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:31 am UTC

So much wrong, yet still so funny.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby ryven » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:43 am UTC

Human wrote:Wait... you don't use a D6 to roll initiative. WRONG!


My red box Basic Set disagrees with you.

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Eseell » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:56 am UTC

Human wrote:Wait... you don't use a D6 to roll initiative. WRONG!

You would if it were a GURPS game.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby osmigos » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:58 am UTC

Human wrote:Wait... you don't use a D6 to roll initiative. WRONG!

One would not normally roll sex dice for initiative either, regardless of sides.

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby thanksbastards » Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:58 am UTC

Dason wrote:Anywho, if your fondling does 6 damage then you're really doing it wrong.

^this.

also I want to say this was one of the greatest I have seen in like a week. randall has really been ontop of his game the last fortnight. kudos.

also I once had a pair of sex dice, then they dissapeared, and I am kinda afraid to ask around to figure out what happened to them...

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby somdude04 » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:07 am UTC

Anoria wrote:Questions that occur to me after reading this comic:

What class/level is the player where they're rolling 2d6 for damage? (Honest question. I don't play enough to know that kind of thing.)


Most likely is a melee class with greatsword. Other candidates are a low level wizard casting flaming sphere, a 12th to 15th level monk's unarmed damage or a 3rd/4th level rogue's sneak attack damage. (3.5e)

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby zyxwv88 » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:14 am UTC

Oh me yarm. That was so freaking hilarious. I laughed until I had tears.

I still chuckle ever time I think about it.

kfetzer
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby kfetzer » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:15 am UTC

Someone watched the Simpsons tonight.

[Lick] [Eyes]?

Mcecny
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Mcecny » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:15 am UTC

It doesnt have to be 2d6 for damage. It could be 1d6 and any combination of dice rolls which add up to 6.

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby aldld » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:21 am UTC

I saw this strip and thought "What the hell?"

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby xquared » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:22 am UTC

kfetzer wrote:Someone watched the Simpsons tonight.

[Lick] [Eyes]?

didn't see simpsons, but "[lick] [eyes]" reminds me of a piece of art by one of my favourite contemporary artist, janine antoni... http://www.trendhunter.com/photos/44884
i heard her gave a talk, she said that's actually very sensual and trusting act, and also good for getting sand out of your partner's eyes.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby xquared » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:28 am UTC

Also, when i saw the second panel initially... i thought to my self, "5 breasts? is this a polymastia joke?"
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Scorpio3002 » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:29 am UTC

somdude04 wrote:
Anoria wrote:Questions that occur to me after reading this comic:

What class/level is the player where they're rolling 2d6 for damage? (Honest question. I don't play enough to know that kind of thing.)


Most likely is a melee class with greatsword. Other candidates are a low level wizard casting flaming sphere, a 12th to 15th level monk's unarmed damage or a 3rd/4th level rogue's sneak attack damage. (3.5e)


Or a ranger dual-wielding short swords.

In other news, this was the best alt title I've seen from randall in weeks.

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby SummerGlauFan » Mon Mar 01, 2010 6:37 am UTC

Believe it or not, this is a Get Out of My Head moment. My cousin, who is married, was telling me the other day about a game (board game I think, or card game, I can't remember) that is for couples. Basically, you land on spots/draw a card and have to do what the spot/card said.

Sorry about the bad memory, but trying to get the mental picture of my naked cousin out of my head must have erased some of the other memories from that conversation.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Pfhorrest » Mon Mar 01, 2010 7:39 am UTC

Your cousin was probably thinking of Onyx, the Game of Sexual Exploration. For up to six players! :-D

Also, I call foul on the last panel. There is clearly a GIRL playing that D&D game! I haven't seen a girl playing D&D since... the girl I lost my virginity to...
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Cynical Idealist » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:08 am UTC

somdude04 wrote:
Anoria wrote:Questions that occur to me after reading this comic:

What class/level is the player where they're rolling 2d6 for damage? (Honest question. I don't play enough to know that kind of thing.)


Most likely is a melee class with greatsword. Other candidates are a low level wizard casting flaming sphere, a 12th to 15th level monk's unarmed damage or a 3rd/4th level rogue's sneak attack damage. (3.5e)

That seems to be the most likely.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby TheoGB » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:12 am UTC

Meh, proper geeks play 1st or 2nd Edition AD&D anyway. I have a feeling the bastard sword does 2D6 damage to L sized creatures so it would have to be a literal giant guard.

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Whyareall » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:33 am UTC

Cynical Idealist wrote:
somdude04 wrote:
Most likely is a melee class with greatsword. Other candidates are a low level wizard casting flaming sphere, a 12th to 15th level monk's unarmed damage or a 3rd/4th level rogue's sneak attack damage. (3.5e)

That seems to be the most likely.


Apparently, my post's active Stealth check beat both your passive Perception checks.
In layman's terms, I ninja'd you both.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby keithc » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:38 am UTC

hintss wrote:yay, first, for the first time, second try!

OK, you came first, that isn't always a good thing, especially when you don't do it right. Then to boast about it as well, and more than once, just seems a little, well, off.

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Essah » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:39 am UTC

so what is on the dices?

standard dice has 6 sides so for the first one its

1.Touch
2. fondle
3. kiss
4. lick
5. ??
6. ??

and the other one

1. Breast
2. mouth
3. neck
4. butt
5. crotch
6. ??

whats the last "sexy" part of the human body???

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby cephalopod9 » Mon Mar 01, 2010 8:39 am UTC

glasnt wrote:Clearly since one dice is missing, he must now find 5 breasts to do with what he will.

Where's Megan's sister when you need her.

HI JOEE
Or else they just need to reference the couple from 487
Image

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Ocker3 » Mon Mar 01, 2010 9:04 am UTC

Pfhorrest wrote:Your cousin was probably thinking of Onyx, the Game of Sexual Exploration. For up to six players! :-D

Also, I call foul on the last panel. There is clearly a GIRL playing that D&D game! I haven't seen a girl playing D&D since... the girl I lost my virginity to...


If you look closely there are Two girls (one with light hair, one with dark). There was a very cool girl in the MERPS group I was in when I lived in Cali, and she was really good at the game. Good roller, good role-player, good gamer. I'd probably still be playing in that group except I moved home to Oz.

Also, the missing dice actions are bite and suck, and I think your body parts one is off. I have some *glow in the dark* sex dice in my dice bag (my Good dice bag), but it's not to hand atm.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby RogueCynic » Mon Mar 01, 2010 11:14 am UTC

Not as funny as "Bender's Game", but still good. I hope the guard is not an owlbear though.

whats the last "sexy" part of the human body???


Thighs. Shaved, soft and warm. Could also be on the back. I remember reading an anesthesiologist gave a woman an orgasm when shocking a nerve in her back to relieve pain.
Last edited by RogueCynic on Mon Mar 01, 2010 7:16 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby baran » Mon Mar 01, 2010 11:28 am UTC

Hey,

am I not getting an inside joke or is there a letter missing in the third segment: Wait, so where's the other sex DIE?

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby kaotik4266 » Mon Mar 01, 2010 11:56 am UTC

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Oh god, that's the funniest thing I've seen in ages!

Sorry I'm not really adding to the discussion but that really tickled my funny bone for some reason! :lol:

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby Leanan » Mon Mar 01, 2010 12:21 pm UTC

baran wrote:Hey,

am I not getting an inside joke or is there a letter missing in the third segment: Wait, so where's the other sex DIE?


What you're not getting is an irregularity of grammar. 'Dice' is the plural, and 'die' is the singular form. You don't have to believe me, I'm a foreigner, you can check a dictionary.
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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby TheoGB » Mon Mar 01, 2010 12:27 pm UTC

Leanan wrote:
baran wrote:Hey,

am I not getting an inside joke or is there a letter missing in the third segment: Wait, so where's the other sex DIE?


What you're not getting is an irregularity of grammar. 'Dice' is the plural, and 'die' is the singular form. You don't have to believe me, I'm a foreigner, you can check a dictionary.


File alongside people being hanged, pictures being hung.

The misuse of die/dice really annoys me, but then so does a failure to distinguish between the noun form of licence and its verb form, as US English takes delight in doing. Don't get me started on 'PIN number' - some cashpoints here ever use it. :shock:

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby baran » Mon Mar 01, 2010 12:40 pm UTC

Leanan wrote:
baran wrote:Hey,

am I not getting an inside joke or is there a letter missing in the third segment: Wait, so where's the other sex DIE?


What you're not getting is an irregularity of grammar. 'Dice' is the plural, and 'die' is the singular form. You don't have to believe me, I'm a foreigner, you can check a dictionary.


Hi,

thank you for the explanation. I checked some dictionaries and some seem to allow dice for the singular form, too. But now I'll know that die is right :)

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Re: "Sex Dice" discusion

Postby TheoGB » Mon Mar 01, 2010 1:00 pm UTC

baran wrote:
Leanan wrote:
baran wrote:Hey,

am I not getting an inside joke or is there a letter missing in the third segment: Wait, so where's the other sex DIE?


What you're not getting is an irregularity of grammar. 'Dice' is the plural, and 'die' is the singular form. You don't have to believe me, I'm a foreigner, you can check a dictionary.


Hi,

thank you for the explanation. I checked some dictionaries and some seem to allow dice for the singular form, too. But now I'll know that die is right :)


Language evolution, I guess. Or not particularly reputable dictionaries. 'News' was still technically a plural word 100-odd years ago and 'data' is still technically the plural of 'datum' but no one really seems to care now if you say 'the data is correct' instead of 'the data are correct', in fact you sound pretty stuffy if you say the latter.


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