1949: "Fruit Collider"

This forum is for the individual discussion thread that goes with each new comic.

Moderators: Moderators General, Prelates, Magistrates

TV4Fun
Posts: 103
Joined: Mon Oct 01, 2007 5:45 am UTC
Location: Certifiable C++ Programmer

1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby TV4Fun » Wed Jan 31, 2018 5:18 pm UTC

Image
Title text: The most delicious exotic fruit discovered this way is the strawberry banana. Sadly, it's only stable in puree form, so it's currently limited to yogurt and smoothies, but they're building a massive collider in Europe to search for a strawberry banana that can be eaten whole.

This is also how tangelos were developed.
$_[0] wrote:rule 2:
Once a relationship ends, physical access to all relevant machinery is denied.

User avatar
Reka
Posts: 216
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:21 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Reka » Wed Jan 31, 2018 5:23 pm UTC

Wait, you mean pomegranates aren't filled with grapes?

User avatar
PinkShinyRose
Posts: 833
Joined: Mon Nov 05, 2012 6:54 pm UTC
Location: the Netherlands

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby PinkShinyRose » Wed Jan 31, 2018 5:25 pm UTC

Reka wrote:Wait, you mean pomegranates aren't filled with grapes?

Of course not, they're filled with apples, hence their name.

User avatar
freezeblade
Posts: 1311
Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 5:11 pm UTC
Location: Oakland

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby freezeblade » Wed Jan 31, 2018 5:36 pm UTC

But how does it explain the Durian fruit?
Looks like a big spikey cannonball of doom (can weigh more than 7 pounds), smells like death (or baby diapers, after eating nothing but tropical fruit for a week), and has an consumptive experience much like chowing down on a big (spiky) bowl of almond flavored custard in a public latrine.
Spoiler:
Image
Belial wrote:I am not even in the same country code as "the mood for this shit."

User avatar
Pfhorrest
Posts: 5006
Joined: Fri Oct 30, 2009 6:11 am UTC
Contact:

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Pfhorrest » Wed Jan 31, 2018 6:20 pm UTC

PinkShinyRose wrote:
Reka wrote:Wait, you mean pomegranates aren't filled with grapes?

Of course not, they're filled with apples, hence their name.

False. Pomegranates are filled with wasp larvae.
Forrest Cameranesi, Geek of All Trades
"I am Sam. Sam I am. I do not like trolls, flames, or spam."
The Codex Quaerendae (my philosophy) - The Chronicles of Quelouva (my fiction)

User avatar
JohnTheWysard
Posts: 101
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 2:38 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby JohnTheWysard » Wed Jan 31, 2018 6:24 pm UTC

Theoreticians are exploring something they call "String Theory" involving hypothetical information-carrying invisible strings which supposedly define the characteristics of the fruit. Particles containing these "strings" are called "pollen grains" and can collide with other constructs called "pistels". Amusing but so far of very little practical value; more money is clearly needed for research.

DavidSh
Posts: 159
Joined: Thu Feb 25, 2016 6:09 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby DavidSh » Wed Jan 31, 2018 6:41 pm UTC

I have actually seen fruit labelled "Apple Bananas" in the store, and I have heard about "Strawberry Guavas", so both of these are presumed stable.

On the other hand, "Strawberry Rhubarb" can serve as pie filling, but is not stable as a standalone fruit.

User avatar
Reka
Posts: 216
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:21 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Reka » Wed Jan 31, 2018 7:04 pm UTC

DavidSh wrote:I have heard about "Strawberry Guavas"

When I lived in California, we had a pineapple guava tree. The fruit didn't explode, so I guess it's a stable combination, but they weren't particularly good.

tgape
Posts: 61
Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2007 5:18 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby tgape » Wed Jan 31, 2018 7:09 pm UTC

Bah! I'm sick and tired of people not understanding the work!

The strawberry banana *is* stable already. It just happens to *grow* already pureed. The continued work in the field is primarily funded by blender companies, who are seeking a way to avoid their products being made obsolete by simple fruit technology advances. There's also, of course, a few neatnik growers who can't stand the mess that results from not correctly anticipating exactly where the plants will grow fruit and placing an appropriate receptacle appropriately to catch the product in time, and from environmental scare-mongers who are freaking out about a plant that has managed to evade the normal fruit limitations on reproduction, in that the strawberry banana does not need any assistance from animal digestive processes to actually reproduce, which they feel makes it potentially as big of a threat to other vegetation as kudzu. Personally, I feel that the fact it only grows in temperate tropical climates properly mitigates its rapid reproductive cycle.

More realistically, I think the real danger is the strawberry watermelon. It has a longer growing cycle, so it's less of a risk at first glance. However, it manages the same feat by producing fruit so large that it collapses under its own weight. Furthermore, the plant is, in every sense apart from it bearing a tasty fruit, a weed: any part of the plant, planted, will grow into a new plant, provided adequate growing conditions. It will also reproduce by sending out runners, like a tomato or briar, and it considers 'adequate growing conditions' to include things that few other plants would consider. Including but not limited to being bathed in DDT on a regular basis. On a personal note, I do not anticipate my research into that particular plant to continue to pose a threat to humanity, as it was entirely within a very tightly controlled lab environment, which has since been launched into the sun. Although, that said, here's hoping that the plant does not consider a giant ball of mostly plasma to be adequate growing conditions. I'm realizing belatedly that I should have tested that bit before making that final, irreversible step. Also, I continue to see increasing amounts of strawberry watermelon products on the market, which suggests strongly to me that others have continued this dangerous work.

User avatar
pkcommando
Posts: 542
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2012 3:22 pm UTC
Location: Allston, MA

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby pkcommando » Wed Jan 31, 2018 7:55 pm UTC

Forget these other foolish pursuits and instead focus on the only one that matters - bring me a True Grāpple. I grow weary of these pretenders to the throne.
"The Universe is for raptors now!" say Raptors, as they take over all of Universe.

typo
Posts: 32
Joined: Wed Jun 16, 2010 4:12 pm UTC
Location: East of the Don and west of the Rouge

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby typo » Wed Jan 31, 2018 8:18 pm UTC

DavidSh wrote:"Strawberry Rhubarb" can serve as pie filling, but is not stable as a standalone fruit.

The Bumbleberry is said to have similar properties. Research is ongoing.

wombat66
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jan 31, 2018 8:18 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby wombat66 » Wed Jan 31, 2018 8:21 pm UTC

Strawberry Banana is the flavor of traditional bubblegum. Coincidence? Yeah, probably...

tgape
Posts: 61
Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2007 5:18 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby tgape » Wed Jan 31, 2018 8:37 pm UTC

pkcommando wrote:Forget these other foolish pursuits and instead focus on the only one that matters - bring me a True Grāpple. I grow weary of these pretenders to the throne.


Now that's an ambitious feat. I have heard they tend to be a bit rambunctious. I prefer fruit that doesn't throw *me* to the ground.

User avatar
cellocgw
Posts: 1953
Joined: Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:40 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby cellocgw » Wed Jan 31, 2018 8:40 pm UTC

Don't give physicists any ideas. Next thing you know, there'll be a whole new set of quantum parameters (like the quarks' Top, Bottom, etc) named after fruits. Then we'll see equations full of <apple|psi|raspberry> notation.
https://app.box.com/witthoftresume
Former OTTer
Vote cellocgw for President 2020. #ScienceintheWhiteHouse http://cellocgw.wordpress.com
"The Planck length is 3.81779e-33 picas." -- keithl
" Earth weighs almost exactly π milliJupiters" -- what-if #146, note 7

anu3bis
Posts: 11
Joined: Mon Dec 08, 2008 5:48 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby anu3bis » Wed Jan 31, 2018 9:07 pm UTC

The Strawberry-Banana was first created in stable form by scientists in Wellington, NZ using a tabletop accelerator.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kiwifruit#/media/File:Kiwi1.1.jpg

keldor
Posts: 71
Joined: Thu Jan 26, 2012 9:18 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby keldor » Wed Jan 31, 2018 10:06 pm UTC

Ah! I always wondered how that worked!

#TheMoreYouKnow

User avatar
Reka
Posts: 216
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2012 10:21 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Reka » Wed Jan 31, 2018 10:17 pm UTC

anu3bis wrote:The Strawberry-Banana was first created in stable form by scientists in Wellington, NZ using a tabletop accelerator.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kiwifruit#/media/File:Kiwi1.1.jpg

Interesting theory, but I'm afraid it's easily disproven1: I quite dislike strawberry-bananas (probably because I don't like strawberries OR bananas), but I love kiwi fruit. Or is the key the use of green/underripe fruit? Hmm. Underripe bananas are actually edible, but on the other hand underripe strawberries are even worse than ripe ones. Anyone know where I can obtain an underripe strawberry-banana? How does one even tell ripeness in that particular hybrid?

1What do you mean, a single example doesn't disprove anything? Of course it does! This is me we're talking about! My preferences are definitive!

User avatar
freezeblade
Posts: 1311
Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 5:11 pm UTC
Location: Oakland

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby freezeblade » Wed Jan 31, 2018 10:45 pm UTC

tgape wrote:...It will also reproduce by sending out runners, like a tomato or briar...


Tomatoes do not send runners.
Belial wrote:I am not even in the same country code as "the mood for this shit."

niauropsaka
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Apr 22, 2013 8:50 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby niauropsaka » Wed Jan 31, 2018 11:36 pm UTC

Tomatoes reconnoitre in force, as victims of killer tomatoes have learnt. A lone forward runner would be pasted quickly.

I'm enough of a biology nerd to be both horrified and amused by today's cartoon.

Quantum physics is totally a real science, you guys!

User avatar
da Doctah
Posts: 927
Joined: Fri Feb 03, 2012 6:27 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby da Doctah » Thu Feb 01, 2018 12:25 am UTC

They always say that when life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade.

Problem for me is that life keeps giving me onions and trying to make me believe they're lemons.

User avatar
Soupspoon
You have done something you shouldn't. Or are about to.
Posts: 3719
Joined: Thu Jan 28, 2016 7:00 pm UTC
Location: 53-1

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Soupspoon » Thu Feb 01, 2018 12:29 am UTC

niauropsaka wrote:Tomatoes reconnoitre in force, as victims of killer tomatoes have learnt. A lone forward runner would be pasted quickly.
And, if in retreat, slower examples would be encouraged to stay with the main crowd, or be smashed to pulp to the cries of. "Ketchup!"

StCredZero
Posts: 19
Joined: Wed Jun 03, 2009 8:52 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby StCredZero » Thu Feb 01, 2018 1:38 am UTC

How about "Particle Ninja?"

User avatar
Peaceful Whale
Posts: 159
Joined: Sun Jul 16, 2017 10:38 pm UTC
Location: Northern Virginia

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Peaceful Whale » Thu Feb 01, 2018 3:08 am UTC

I really want to try some of these fruits...
My meta for future reference
Spoiler:
cemper93 wrote:Your meta appears to be "just writes whatever is on his mind and doesn't remember what happened more than five hours ago"

User avatar
JohnTheWysard
Posts: 101
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 2:38 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby JohnTheWysard » Thu Feb 01, 2018 4:14 am UTC

niauropsaka wrote:Tomatoes reconnoitre in force, as victims of killer tomatoes have learnt.


"Beefeater! Lord deliver us!
A tomato plant that is carnivorous!
You search its leaves for aphid eggs;
its hairy vines reach for your legs!
You have to hit it with a hoe
Before the little thing lets go!"

- Keillor

Nuvector
Posts: 7
Joined: Mon Jan 29, 2018 8:34 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Nuvector » Thu Feb 01, 2018 5:31 am UTC

TV4Fun wrote:The most delicious exotic fruit discovered this way is the strawberry banana. Sadly, it's only stable in puree form, so it's currently limited to yogurt and smoothies, but they're building a massive collider in Europe to search for a strawberry banana that can be eaten whole.

This is also how tangelos were developed.


The search for the elusive "God Fruit" continues...

peregrine7
Posts: 3
Joined: Wed Aug 05, 2015 4:00 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby peregrine7 » Thu Feb 01, 2018 5:35 am UTC

While it's not quite using a fruit accelerator, there actually WAS Atomic Gardening for a while in the 50s and 60s.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyl ... james-wong

Basically, a plot was planted around a radioactive source, such as Cobalt-60, and exposed to that source. The stuff close in often all died off, and the stuff at the edges didn't seem to have much difference, but there was stuff in the sweet spot that would give interesting results.

wraith_legion
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Feb 01, 2018 5:59 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby wraith_legion » Thu Feb 01, 2018 6:05 am UTC

A watermelon-sized peach would be my death. I'd be found, smile on my face, heart still twitching, with a pile of baseball-sized peach pits up to my knees.

User avatar
Eshru
Posts: 146
Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2010 3:51 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Eshru » Thu Feb 01, 2018 10:18 am UTC

da Doctah wrote:They always say that when life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade.

Problem for me is that life keeps giving me onions and trying to make me believe they're lemons.

When life gives me lemons I make lemonade apples, or if I'm feeling particularly uppity, lemonade apple pie.

petz
Posts: 14
Joined: Wed Nov 16, 2011 9:24 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby petz » Thu Feb 01, 2018 10:47 am UTC

This comic made me ask if there isn't a periodic table of fruit elements. I wonder how you would sort that? And which elemental fruits could you put on it? Like only mandarin and grapefruit but not orange, because it's a mix of the first two.

User avatar
Eternal Density
Posts: 5559
Joined: Thu Oct 02, 2008 12:37 am UTC
Contact:

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Eternal Density » Thu Feb 01, 2018 11:35 am UTC

This is a pretty fun idea.

Also, colliding pairs of moles sometimes yields a compsognathus, but only about one per mole of moles collided.
Play the game of Time! castle.chirpingmustard.com Hotdog Vending Supplier But what is this?
In the Marvel vs. DC film-making war, we're all winners.

User avatar
cellocgw
Posts: 1953
Joined: Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:40 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby cellocgw » Thu Feb 01, 2018 12:15 pm UTC

petz wrote:This comic made me ask if there isn't a periodic table of fruit elements. I wonder how you would sort that? And which elemental fruits could you put on it? Like only mandarin and grapefruit but not orange, because it's a mix of the first two.


Ask and ye shall receive
https://app.box.com/witthoftresume
Former OTTer
Vote cellocgw for President 2020. #ScienceintheWhiteHouse http://cellocgw.wordpress.com
"The Planck length is 3.81779e-33 picas." -- keithl
" Earth weighs almost exactly π milliJupiters" -- what-if #146, note 7

User avatar
ColletArrow
Posts: 35
Joined: Thu Dec 07, 2017 10:01 pm UTC
Location: Stuck at NP 774

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby ColletArrow » Thu Feb 01, 2018 12:40 pm UTC

This is pretty good, although all I can think of when I see the comic is this video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbenrpfuxHs

User avatar
pkcommando
Posts: 542
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2012 3:22 pm UTC
Location: Allston, MA

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby pkcommando » Thu Feb 01, 2018 12:59 pm UTC

peregrine7 wrote:Basically, a plot was planted around a radioactive source, such as Cobalt-60, and exposed to that source. The stuff close in often all died off after an extended battle with the locals who only barely survived the onslaught of gigantic, radioactive, killer produce, ...

FTFY
"The Universe is for raptors now!" say Raptors, as they take over all of Universe.

flymousechiu
Posts: 26
Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2014 11:19 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby flymousechiu » Thu Feb 01, 2018 2:37 pm UTC

stable, meaning will has a expiration time longer than 300μs?

flymousechiu
Posts: 26
Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2014 11:19 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby flymousechiu » Thu Feb 01, 2018 2:39 pm UTC

StCredZero wrote:How about "Particle Ninja?"

taken off app store due to people's concern of cell-phone radiation.

User avatar
JohnTheWysard
Posts: 101
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 2:38 am UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby JohnTheWysard » Thu Feb 01, 2018 5:37 pm UTC

flymousechiu wrote:stable, meaning will has a expiration time longer than 300μs?

No, meaning "stable" as being fertilized by the output from a stable.

User avatar
Soupspoon
You have done something you shouldn't. Or are about to.
Posts: 3719
Joined: Thu Jan 28, 2016 7:00 pm UTC
Location: 53-1

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Soupspoon » Thu Feb 01, 2018 5:42 pm UTC

[url][/url]
JohnTheWysard wrote:
flymousechiu wrote:stable, meaning will has a expiration time longer than 300μs?

No, meaning "stable" as being fertilized by the output from a stable.

That's horse-shit, and you know it!

User avatar
LaserGuy
Posts: 4558
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2009 5:33 pm UTC

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby LaserGuy » Thu Feb 01, 2018 6:33 pm UTC

cellocgw wrote:
petz wrote:This comic made me ask if there isn't a periodic table of fruit elements. I wonder how you would sort that? And which elemental fruits could you put on it? Like only mandarin and grapefruit but not orange, because it's a mix of the first two.


Ask and ye shall receive


I spent an inordinately long time staring at that low resolution image trying to figure out what the columns were supposed to represent (why are lemon and grapefruit in the same column but not orange?).

User avatar
Sableagle
Ormurinn's Alt
Posts: 1933
Joined: Sat Jun 13, 2015 4:26 pm UTC
Location: The wrong side of the mirror
Contact:

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Sableagle » Thu Feb 01, 2018 7:03 pm UTC

freezeblade wrote:Tomatoes do not send runners.
No, but someone with the runs could help propagate the tomato plant.
Oh, Willie McBride, it was all done in vain.

Mikeski
Posts: 1042
Joined: Sun Jan 13, 2008 7:24 am UTC
Location: Minnesota, USA

Re: 1949: "Fruit Collider"

Postby Mikeski » Thu Feb 01, 2018 7:33 pm UTC

LaserGuy wrote:
cellocgw wrote:
petz wrote:This comic made me ask if there isn't a periodic table of fruit elements. I wonder how you would sort that? And which elemental fruits could you put on it? Like only mandarin and grapefruit but not orange, because it's a mix of the first two.


Ask and ye shall receive


I spent an inordinately long time staring at that low resolution image trying to figure out what the columns were supposed to represent (why are lemon and grapefruit in the same column but not orange?).

That chart is what happens when artists try to science.


Return to “Individual XKCD Comic Threads”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Archgeek, Google Feedfetcher, speising and 27 guests